Back in 2011, when I was a kid, I did start a Roblox YouTube channel with 3 other people, with the totally modest dream of becoming Internet famous. Creating a TV show, in a sense, online, with unique characters and settings and all sorts of stuff. It was a really great feeling, and through it, even though it only got about 20 subs, I learned a lot about what YouTube was about, creating a community. That channel's long since been dead, though.
What inspired me to make this channel, which is when I'd consider I started making a "professional" YouTube channel (consistent uploads, reading up on tutorials, a personal niche, etc) was that I just went through a pretty tough time. This is a story I've always been open about sharing, since it's a part of who I am. Why I'm the person I am today. And I'd think, it also helps eliminate stigmas, being open and unashamed. But, I actually survived a suicide attempt. I had a pretty terrible living situation at home, not a whole lot to really keep me motivated or happy. After that, I spent about a year in treatment, and when I finally got out, I swore to myself I'd never let myself get that low again. And one of the ways I realized that could help with that is keeping busy. YouTube's the perfect way to keep busy. You need to have consistent uploads, work on thumbnails, editing, production, come up with ideas. If you do YouTube consistently, you should have no problem keeping yourself busy. And it's keeping myself busy with something I know I enjoy. And going back on what I said about the community, that's something very important to me. Having people that rely on you and look up to you. And having people you know are there for you. Even if you don't know them on a personal basis. They're people who are willing and want to hear you talk. And growing up with social anxiety and self-esteem issues and the like, that's a really reassuring feeling. For people who do commentary and the like, that really helps build up those public speaking skills, which I used to be heavily insecure about. I wanted to make a community that I could pass some of my own values onto or be surrounded by. Being able to have a sense of humor, standing up for what you believe in, having thick skin, etc. And I wanted to be diverse, instead of sticking to one genre, because it reflects on who I am. Someone willing to change and adapt to any environment they're forced into. I got a lot of inspiration from satire channels, who have my sense of humor (Leafy, Pyrocynical, DramaAlert, and definitely 2016-2017 PewDiePie) and definitely inspiration from YouTubers who have really good and close-knit communities like Jacksepticeye and Markiplier. Brownie points to anyone who read this gigantic personal post. I feel like it was more of a rant than anything. xD
