FoldingNotes
Loving YTtalk
Over the past few months, my channel growth was virtually stagnant. After a year of so many purges and having fallen from a record of 954 subscribers, it became a huge regret for me. Some of you might say: "Why did you do this?! That's something to be proud of?!" It really was. I destroyed too much of my work. All the vlogs of "I give you a hamburger", "Mary the Googly Ball" (Geez 4000 views) "what it means to be a sad potato" "The interviews" and "Through the Mists" have all been destroyed by me. Until recently I deleted another video called "I am the Illuminati Confirmed."
Now here I was hitting rock bottom. That was when I started to turn to the worst thing every YouTube possibly hates: Spamming.
Yes. I'm being brutally honest here. I begged in the streets of YouTube. I have fallen from paradise in the beginning. There was no other option other than wait, and I couldn't afford the lost time. Some of you may be saying: "Of course you shouldn't." I can only pray for my disease of unforgiven attitude to end, but I cannot prevent the effects which are happening now.
And where are the rest of my old subscribers? They're gone, and a few are lost: "Where is he? Where is Harry the Googly Ball?" Some may see my profile picture, but they may not realize I am the True Harry who raked in the likes on the comments section. Now a few may view me as some impersonator. I am not the impersonator.
"Do what you love! Don't spam!" That is true to an extent, but I owe my old subscribers a huge debt to be repaid due to the purges. I don't have much credibility anymore unless I prove myself with a huge number: I am not an impersonator. I no longer can recover my mp4s, and a bunch of images are sitting in my cloud drive like crazy. I'm slowly releasing them onto Flickr and Deviantart, and the process is slow.
What else am I supposed to do? I had no other choice but to beg. That was when my number jumped up. It was a gamble with a few consequences.
I am sorry I broke the code. Some of you will say "Well it's your fault." It is my fault. My entire fault. It's a brutal mental illness gone undiagnosed I'm afraid: "I'm feeling even worthless right now if I don't do anything to compensate for the lost time." Now everything is a dearth, and I can't tell how painful it is seeing my work go to waste. It is my fault. I am sorry. Pardon me and forgive me for what I have been doing over the course of a year. It's really not the number of subscribers I am concerned about, but how much damage I have inflicted: Leaving everyone behind and destroying everything I had created. It's a debt that may not even get paid and an illness that may not get cured. It's no use giving up when your reputation already hits rock bottom.
Now here I was hitting rock bottom. That was when I started to turn to the worst thing every YouTube possibly hates: Spamming.
Yes. I'm being brutally honest here. I begged in the streets of YouTube. I have fallen from paradise in the beginning. There was no other option other than wait, and I couldn't afford the lost time. Some of you may be saying: "Of course you shouldn't." I can only pray for my disease of unforgiven attitude to end, but I cannot prevent the effects which are happening now.
And where are the rest of my old subscribers? They're gone, and a few are lost: "Where is he? Where is Harry the Googly Ball?" Some may see my profile picture, but they may not realize I am the True Harry who raked in the likes on the comments section. Now a few may view me as some impersonator. I am not the impersonator.
"Do what you love! Don't spam!" That is true to an extent, but I owe my old subscribers a huge debt to be repaid due to the purges. I don't have much credibility anymore unless I prove myself with a huge number: I am not an impersonator. I no longer can recover my mp4s, and a bunch of images are sitting in my cloud drive like crazy. I'm slowly releasing them onto Flickr and Deviantart, and the process is slow.
What else am I supposed to do? I had no other choice but to beg. That was when my number jumped up. It was a gamble with a few consequences.
I am sorry I broke the code. Some of you will say "Well it's your fault." It is my fault. My entire fault. It's a brutal mental illness gone undiagnosed I'm afraid: "I'm feeling even worthless right now if I don't do anything to compensate for the lost time." Now everything is a dearth, and I can't tell how painful it is seeing my work go to waste. It is my fault. I am sorry. Pardon me and forgive me for what I have been doing over the course of a year. It's really not the number of subscribers I am concerned about, but how much damage I have inflicted: Leaving everyone behind and destroying everything I had created. It's a debt that may not even get paid and an illness that may not get cured. It's no use giving up when your reputation already hits rock bottom.
