Review my first edited video

Zentraxius

Member
What's up guys Zentraxius here, today I finally got tech savvy enough to get my first video both rendered and with a facecam in it. Was hoping on of you awesome dudes could review it and tell me where I need to improve. I know I need to, this isn't a "Tell me I'm pretty" scene, I feel like I babbled too much and my tone felt too.. transactional? The only noteworthy area I feel like I can improve on is trying to actually be funny or entertaining to watch, I don't have a cute accent or a sexy voice, I'm not much to look at and I'm not funny so I'm not sure which direction to go in order to try and fix that. But in the meantime while I sort out this life crisis, can people give me pointers on what else needs improvement as well as any suggestions/experiences they have similar?
 
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