Review my new video please!
- Thread starter LEXAcide
- Start date
MrLionProductions
I've Got It
wtf lol
Token
Loving YTtalk
Ok...first off, I'm gonna be really critical cuz you asked for advice, and this will help you.
I don't know why everyone starting out thinks they need to brand their videos by putting intros on their work...it's better placed at the end of the video, put us in the action first. I think that would have been more effective for what you're trying to go for. I think in the beginning, you focused too much on you waking up...it was a really long pause. I believe if you made it shorter, it'd be easier to the viewer to follow. I understand you were trying to build suspense, but it still dragged, you know? Taking more than 30 seconds to "wake up" is too long.
Also, compared to your intro music, your volume was really low. And when you woke up in the first dream, the camera angle was askew...half your head was cut off, which you never want. Gotta try and have the whole head in the frame, and again, too long to wake up. I could see that scene being like 10 seconds shorter and keep the same tone.
I think the "wtf" coming from Mr. Lion is partially because you took a little long to get to the point...but on a more serious tone, what is the point? I understand the gorilla is chasing you, but you have no real context as to why the gorilla is chasing you. We don't know if you did anything. We don't know if you know the gorilla. It doesn't seem natural...if that makes any sense. Kind of forced, you know? Like, your story doesn't have to tie neatly into a bow, but it does need context so we understand what's going on at least a little bit.
But that's just my two cents. Take with it what you will.
I don't know why everyone starting out thinks they need to brand their videos by putting intros on their work...it's better placed at the end of the video, put us in the action first. I think that would have been more effective for what you're trying to go for. I think in the beginning, you focused too much on you waking up...it was a really long pause. I believe if you made it shorter, it'd be easier to the viewer to follow. I understand you were trying to build suspense, but it still dragged, you know? Taking more than 30 seconds to "wake up" is too long.
Also, compared to your intro music, your volume was really low. And when you woke up in the first dream, the camera angle was askew...half your head was cut off, which you never want. Gotta try and have the whole head in the frame, and again, too long to wake up. I could see that scene being like 10 seconds shorter and keep the same tone.
I think the "wtf" coming from Mr. Lion is partially because you took a little long to get to the point...but on a more serious tone, what is the point? I understand the gorilla is chasing you, but you have no real context as to why the gorilla is chasing you. We don't know if you did anything. We don't know if you know the gorilla. It doesn't seem natural...if that makes any sense. Kind of forced, you know? Like, your story doesn't have to tie neatly into a bow, but it does need context so we understand what's going on at least a little bit.
But that's just my two cents. Take with it what you will.
Michael
I Love YTtalk
I couldn't agree more with what Token has said, we dont know any of the plot other than gorilla man is chasing you and seems like he wants to kill you and possibly make love to you (they were condoms he held out right? lol). I dont think that gorilla man has enough scary factor, maybe adding some roaring sound effects so he is more expressive and I think your fear of him could be worked on a bit as you didn't look very scared at least not to me 
At the end it didn't seem so dramatic as the gorilla seemed to reach out to help you more than go after you if you get me. It was still good all in all other than a few things here and there, good work.
At the end it didn't seem so dramatic as the gorilla seemed to reach out to help you more than go after you if you get me. It was still good all in all other than a few things here and there, good work.