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StarWars Fan Film FeedBack

Discussion in 'Reviews & Channel Feedback' started by morelikecappuccino, Mar 15, 2017.

  1. morelikecappuccino
    Be Kind: Please Rewind
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    Hey what do you think of my new short film?

    Cinematography?
    Visual effects?
    Sound?
    How were you left feeling afterwards?


    (Please keep in mind this is not a VLOG or letsplay so please do not review it as such. EG: "Perhaps you could include more personality about yourself next time." )
     
  2. The NotARubicon!
    NotARubicon Productions
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    It started out a bit slow. 20 seconds for the intro, etc, was too long IMHO, then the next 20-30 seconds were slow and a bit meh, you almost lost me, but I hung in there and then wow! Once the action started (you made me wait over a friggen minute!) it was really good - great action cinematography.
     
  3. Famous
    I've Got It
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    The intro lingered in each segment more than it needed to. The beginning of the actual film, where they stare at one another lacked tension. Given the "feel" of the scene it could have been shortened up. The fight scene was pretty impressive, well choreographed, congratulations on that. But then came the end credits... they were longer than the film... longer than the film man! But I did like the way you showed peoples pictures and such, that was a neat touch. Overall it was good, however... you need to pick up the contrast if you're going to use computer graphics for a background. The live action video was quite "grey". And the color key removal of the sky that you replaced with black and a moon... should have had stars to break up the black. It was just too dark. Maybe the skyline of a martian planet background could have been used for more color? Overall, I'd have to say don't take my critique in a bad way, that was a good video... If you made another I'd definitely watch it!
     
  4. morelikecappuccino
    Be Kind: Please Rewind
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    Ive been experimenting with this tension for some time now, still cant get it right :/

    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    It does seem to be irrelevant to have nearly as much story as I did for just an action scene.

    [​IMG]
     
  5. Famous
    I've Got It
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    Trying to convey tension is always difficult... A few thoughts that could be implemented ....

    1. Tighter shots. Your actors are lost in such an expansive background. Move closer so your characters take up more on screen real estate. At 33 seconds Anna is barely visible.
    2. Perspective. Using the 33 second shot for example, Anna could have stood closer to the foreground had she moved screen right. This should have kept the perception of distance between her and Lorie while making Anna easier to see.
    3. Movement. When your actors aren't moving, the camera should be. Trucking right a bit at 33 seconds, or around Lori at 38 seconds would have added tension (especially had Lori's shot been tighter) As well as dollying in towards Anna at 53 seconds... you dollied away from her, which reduced tension.
    4. Trimming. From 19 seconds to the minute 4 second mark each of the scenes could have been trimmed shorter to keep the energy up from one scene to the next, rather than trying to use long pauses to create tension.

    Overall I thought your short was fantastic, it seriously left me wanting to see your next video. Keep in mind my suggestions are just that, suggestions... they're not intended to take away from your work at all, just observations from the comfort of my chair. ;)
     
  6. OrangeJuiceHarry
    Active Member
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    I can't really say I know much about special affects, but DAAAAMMMMNNNNNN!!!!! It was really fantastic, though you could obviously see that the background was fake, and after she got stabbed there was no hole, it's better than I could do for sure. 9.5/10
     
    morelikecappuccino likes this.
  7. DeliciousCrackers
    Liking YTtalk
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    I cringed real hard at the acting, i feel like you either go full retard when you don't have professional actors and have fun with it or take it seriously.
    I REALLY like the effects though. From a pacing stand point, work on it. Its a bit too slow for a jedi fight, work on it, practice, pacing gets better, and you have the FX in the bag already. Combine both = great videos.
    Best of luck mate!
    Hope i helped!
     
    morelikecappuccino likes this.

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